A Wednesday list...New Year edition
Happy New Year, everyone! Are you back in the swing of everyday life yet? Still suffering from Holiday Hangover? Did you ignore the "holiday season" altogether and are just waiting for everyone else to catch up? We spent a wonderful week in Missouri with my family (wonderful IN SPITE of a little stomach virus. But who better to take care of you when you're sick than your mom and dad? Hi mom and dad!), and I'm letting myself ease into things now that we're back home (my present self is high-fiving my past self for getting the house extra clean before our trip. I love coming home to a really clean house).
I love the rhythm of the new year in a similar way to how I like the rhythm of changing seasons. Every day is a fresh start -- in some contexts, every moment can be a fresh start -- but for me there is something special about a definitive marker, an external motivation. Several years ago (and I have probably talked about this before) our friends began the yearly New Year's Day tradition of reflecting on the past year and setting goals for the next (even if the goal is as straightforward and un-fancy as -- keep my children alive one more year). Life has evolved to a place where that group of friends can't always do this together anymore, but I still find it a helpful practice to spend this time of year doing some reflecting and dreaming.
There are so many ways of approaching New Year's goal setting, approaches such as...
1. Don't set any "New Year" goals. Set goals whenever you feel like it. On a random Thursday in March, for example
2. Practice quarterly/periodic goal setting. Author Tsh Oxenreider talks about this some (you can read about it here), referencing her practice of scheduling "Think Days" throughout the year. It seems to me to be an approach that is both business-minded but also perfect for people who don't want to think past the next couple of months.
3. Re-frame it. My friends Sarah and Jonathan have started making "skills lists" in January of skills they want to work on throughout the year, instead of setting goals. The Lazy Genius suggests asking: what are you looking forward to this year? as a way to take a break from any pressure one might feel in the idea of "goal setting."
Personally, I like all of these approaches. But I also like some good old fashioned reflecting and goal setting. HOWEVER. I have learned to be okay with changing gears mid-year. I like to mix up specific goals with more nebulous theme words or phrases. This year I've been framing things in terms of priorities rather than goals -- what are my priorities for 2019? Are there specific goals I can set that fall in line with those priorities?
So even though I've said a lot of words already, in the spirit of The Wednesday list here are just a few reflections on the previous and upcoming year:
Four things I learned (or re-learned) in 2018:
1. It's okay to change direction, shift your focus, and reevaluate previous goals and plans. Y'all. When I looked back and my 2018 goals I just had to laugh. I think the only one I actually accomplished was potty train the kids (all the hallelujahs on that one) and of the remaining goals, only one of them stayed relevant to my year. I completely changed direction and focus. THAT'S OK. Goals are for me, and if I learned something from erasing them instead of checking them off, then they still served a purpose.
2. I am not a naturally-inclined entrepreneur, and -- most important lesson of all -- THAT'S OK.
3. Discomfort is necessary to growth.
4. How to froth milk with a mason jar and a microwave. Game. Changer.
Three goals/priorities for 2019, and three things I'm looking forward to:
1. Run a half marathon (I'm signed up! One step down...)
2. Write five days a week -- whether that's random essays, more blog post, or creative fiction. Less restriction on the "what" and more just getting words out and on the page.
3. I want to prioritize connecting with people: writing letters (I know, sounds weird to some of you, but I LOVE writing letters), texting, calling, inviting people to our home or out to do fun things. This also includes connecting with my family -- using our everyday opportunities (meals, movie watching, whatever) intentionally.
I'm looking forward to...
1 Some travel plans we have shaping up for this year.
2.Re-discovering bread baking.
3. Trying out a version of this quarterly Think Day idea (it may be more like a Think Hour. I've got preschoolers after all). I'll keep you posted.
So here we go. Bring it on 2019.