When 1 + 1 does not equal 2
Information is everywhere, and you can access information in almost any way you can imagine. As a librarian, I'm predisposed to think this is a great thing. As a librarian, my mind also jumps to all the complications of a seemingly endless and easily accessible well of information. How do you know what's reliable? How do you get what you need easily and quickly? What's the best format for a particular piece of information? How do you preserve it, organize it, make it available? How do you decide what's worth keeping (and organizing for that matter)?
When I became a parent, the one thing I knew was that I didn't know anything. I was eager to learn and eager for information. Pregnancy, giving birth, taking care of a baby, raising a human being. I knew next to nothing, and my first instinct was to want to know as much as possible. And anyone parenting in this age of information will tell you that there is just so. much. advice. out there. You could go broke buying baby books and child rearing books, and all of them are going to contradict each other. Add to that blogs and web sites and parenting articles published in nearly any online publication imaginable. Add to that the way parents used to get advice: friends, neighbors, parents.
It's a lot. And sooner than I expected, I stopped my never-ending quest to have the perfect amount and blend of parenting knowledge. For one thing, it's overwhelming. But what I've begun to realize is that the overabundance of parenting advice and information can lead to the assumption that there is one right way to do things. One perfect formula that will give you the results you want. Only one problem with that:
Kids are people too.
Crazy concept, I know, but when I can remember that my kids are little human beings, it helps me to keep a little perspective. Perspective when the kids are tantruming...or fighting...or reaching milestones at their own pace....or taking their time with potty training....or not sleeping the way I think they should sleep. Kids are people too, and those little personalities (or big personalities) and preferences and thoughts and desires result in a lot of variables. Is seeking advice a good thing? Sure. But I've realized I'm a whole lot happier if I spend less time reading about what everyone else is doing, less time looking for "expert" formulas and more time loving on my kids, praying for them, and just getting to know them and finding out what makes them tick.